Changing the Subject in a Conversation

A.

The dialogue can be extended by introducing new topics. The following phrases or transitions can be used

Oh, by the way…

That reminds me of…

Speaking about/of…

Talking of …

Before I forget…

Oh, I nearly forgot…

Oh, while I remember…

I just thought of something…

Oh, there’s something else I wanted/meant to say/ask you…

Oh, I knew there was something I meant/wanted to tell you

Oh, I know what I wanted/meant to say/tell/ask you…

This has nothing to do with what we are talking about, but…

I know this is changing the subject, but…

Changing the subject for a minute…

Funny / strange you should mention/say that…

That’s funny, because something similar…

Incidentally…

B.

Interrupting a conversation

You can use the following interrupting strategies to break into a conversation:

I’m sorry to interrupt…

Sorry to break ink but…

Sorry, may I interrupt you for a second…

Excuse me /Pardon me for interrupting, but…

If I may interrupt for a second...

C.

Returning to the topic

As I was saying…

Now, what was I saying…?

Where was I…?

Going back to what I was saying…

Let’s go back to…

In any case….

D.

Common Fillers in Conversation

The thing is…

I see, what you mean..?

The sort/kind of thing…

It’s like this, you see…

Right then…

Let’s say…

What I’m trying to say is…

Now, where should I start…?

That’s a good/interesting question…

What I would say is….

How shall I put it…?

Let’s put it this way…

The best way I can answer that is…

I’ll tell you what…

Now let me think/see…

I’ll have to think about it…

To be quite honest/frank…

As a matter of fact….

Let’s see now….

I wonder if…

E.

Asking for Repetition

Sorry, what did you say? / What was that again?

What was the word/ the first word/his name/the last sentence again?

Would / Could you repeat that/ what you said / that name / the last word, please?

Could you repeat that for me, please?

Would you mind repeating that?

Sorry, can you say that again, please?

Sorry, would you mind speaking a bit slower?

I’m sorry; I couldn’t /didn’t hear what you said.

I’m sorry. When /who / where / what time did you say?

Hang on / just a minute, say that again? I didn’t quite catch that…

Did you say....?

Did I hear you right when you said…?

I would like to confirm that you said…

Excuse me, can I just confirm that….

Typical Conversation Starters

The most common kind of spoken language is conversation, when one person communicates through speaking to another person or to other people. Just as there are patterns in sounds, words, and sentences, so also there are patterns in conversation. Even in the most unpredictable conversations, there are certain devices that we use time and time again. If a person wants to tell a joke or some bad news or to ask for a special favour, there are recognized ways of introducing these subjects. Without these cues, listeners would be very disconcerted.

Conversations are orderly and proceed in an organized way, but all the participants have to work at the conversation, making sense of things, supporting each other, checking for meaning, and so on. A conversation, unlike a piece of written work, is very much the work of at least two people. One defining characteristic of a conversation is that it does not involve only what is said but also how it is said. One way in which conversation is organized is through utterances of a certain type that go together.

A greeting is usually followed by another greeting.

              Hello               Hi

These utterances are called adjacency pairs. Some examples of these pairs are:

Question          - Answer

Request           - Acceptance or refusal

Complaint       -Apology/denial

Compliment    - Acceptance/rejection.

These structures help to keep the conversation going and enable other people to participate. Questions are especially useful in supporting conversation. When these devices are violated, this can cause anxiety, distress, annoyance, or confusion. These reactions demonstrate the importance of observing the rules of conversation.

A.

Typical Conversation Starters:

Excuse me,

Forgive me for asking

I hope you don’t mind me asking,

I’m sorry to trouble you,

Aren't you the son of …?

Haven’t we met before?

Could I borrow your pen?

Is anyone sitting here?

Is this seat taken?

Talking about the weather

o       Can you believe all of this rain we’ve been having?

o       It looks like it’s going to snow.

o       Beautiful day, isn’t it?

o       It sure would be nice to be in Hawaii right about now.

o       I hear they’re calling for thunderstorms all weekend.

o       We couldn’t ask for a nicer day, could we?

o       How about this weather?

o       Did you order this sunshine?

o       Lovely day, isn’t it?

Talking about current events

• Did you catch the news today?
• Did you hear about that fire on Fourth St?
• What do you think about this transit strike?
• I read in the paper today that the Sears Mall is closing.
• I heard on the radio today that they are finally going to start building the new bridge.
• How about those Reds? Do you think they’re going to win tonight?

B.

At the office

• Looking forward to the weekend?
• Have you worked here long?
• I can’t believe how busy/quiet we are today, can you?
• Has it been a long week?
• You look like you could use a cup of coffee.
• What do you think of the new computers?

C.

At a social event

• So, how do you know Justin?
• Have you tried the cabbage rolls that Sandy made?
• Are you enjoying yourself?
• It looks like you could use another drink.
• Pretty nice place, huh?
• I like your dress. Can I ask where you got it?

D.

Out for a walk

• How old’s your baby?
• What’s your puppy’s name?
• The tulips are sure beautiful at this time of year, aren’t they?
• How do you like the new part?
• Nice day to be outside, isn’t it?

E.

Waiting somewhere

• I didn’t think it would be so busy today.
• You look like you’ve got your hands full (with children or goods).
• The bus must be running late today.
• It looks like we are going to be here a while, huh?
• I’ll have to remember not to come here on Mondays.
• How long have you been waiting?

F.

Other Starters

• Those are lovely flowers!
• What a marvelous party!
• Don’t you think she’s gorgeous?
• That’s so wonderful!
• Yes, it is gorgeous. It’s raining here!
• What kind are they? I love tulips.
• Oh that was really fun, wasn’t it?
• Not really. Oh yes, she is a looker.

G.

Make a comment on something present:

Traffic everywhere is terrible!

This isn’t so bad. You could be stuck in Manila traffic!

The service on this line is getting worse day after day!

They must be short handed today.

Can you believe it?

No way! It can’t be true!

Transportation fare has gone up again!

It drives me nuts that everything keeps going up and up.

When will it ever stop raining?

I actually like rainy days. But, one week of rain is a little hard to deal with.

Stating you Remember or don’t Remember

Read the following word groups aloud several times. Please don’t try to learn by-heart. Your sub-conscious mind will do that job, even without your knowledge, and rush onto your tongue whenever required. Yes, your job is just to read these word groups aloud several times.

A.

Stating that you remember or don’t remember

Yes, I remember.

I don’t remember meeting you there.

I remember sending the letter.

I can’t remember.

I remember I had put it there. I’m sorry I don’t remember.

I don’t remember that incident.

I’ll always remember what you said the other day.

I’ve forgotten to bring my note book.

I’m sorry; the meeting completely slipped my mind.

Yes I remember him very well.

Ah! Now I remember.

Oh dear! I completely forgot about it.

Yes, I’ve got it now.

It’d completely slipped my mind.

Yes, the whole episode is coming back to me now.

My mind has gone completely blank.

B.

Asking whether remembers or has forgotten

Do you remember me?

Do you remember, what we had discussed the other day?

Do you remember telling him about it?

Have you forgotten? Today’s the College Day.

You remember John, don’t you?

Did you remember to meet him?

You haven’t forgotten to post it, have you?

You do remember Mary, don’t you?

Do you remember his name?

Surely, you haven’t forgotten him?

You gave him some sweets, didn’t you?

Surely, you remember today’s the last day?

I hope you didn’t forget to bring my CDs again.

C.

Expressing intention

I’m going to delete this file.

I’m going to cut it into pieces.

I’ll wait until you come.

I certainly don’t intend to wait here any more.

I have no intention of taking leave now.

Here’s what I intend to do.

I intend to visit London next week.

I’m visiting my parents this weekend.

I’m considering leaving this place.

I thing I should visit them more often.

I’m not going to listen to this rubbish any longer.

I’m going to stay in…

I don’t intend to argue about it.

I plan to invite them all.

I've got something fixed up for today.

D.

Asking about intention

Will you take responsibility for this damage?

What are you going to do about it?

Do you intend to do anything about it?

Are you going to do the washing today?

What do you plan to do about it?

Will you deny the charge?

Aren’t you going to do anything about it?

What are you thinking of doing about it?

What are you going to do?

I’d like to know what you intend to do about it?

Are you thinking of going out today?

Expressing Indifference

Read the following word groups aloud several times. Please don’t try to learn by-heart. Your sub-conscious mind will do that job, even without your knowledge, and rush onto your tongue whenever required. Yes, your job is just to read these word groups aloud several times.

A.

Expressing indifference

I suppose so.

I don’t mind what ever you do?

I don’t mind.

Who cares!

Who knows!

I don’t care!

I’m easy.

I don’t mind.

I have no preference.

It’s all the same to me.

It’s your decision.

As you like.

Do as you like.

It makes no difference to me.

It makes no difference.

You can say whatever you like.

Do what you like. I don’t care.

It makes no difference either way.

I shouldn’t worry if I were you.

I know he’ll be angry, but I don’t care.

How should I know?

Look, why don’t you relax?

It doesn’t matter.

Go ahead, do it.

If you like.

I wouldn’t mind.

Why should I?

I couldn’t care less.

So what?

B.

Admitting

I know.

I admit that.

I’m entirely to blame for it.

I made the mistake of trusting him.

I had a part in that decision, too

I admit that I was absent-minded.

I don’t know much Hindi.

Yes, all right.

Yes, it’s possible.

I’m sorry. It was a mistake on my part.

It was my mistake entirely.

Well, it could be true.

No one is to blame but myself.

I've made a mistake in inviting them

He may be able to do it. Yes.

It was my fault entirely.

What I said was quite wrong.

C.

Response to Admittance

Don’t repeat again.

Don’t repeat the same mistake again.

Don’t try to harass me – I’m warning you.

You’ll be more careful in future, won’t you?

Don’t give me any more cause for complaint.

I don’t think that was very wise.

Next time, I won’t forgive this kind of behaviour.

You had better watch out!

You had better not make another mistake.

Don’t all talk together?

I wouldn’t do such a thing again, if I were you.

Just be more considerate in future.

If you do this again, I’ll come down hard on you.

D.

Expressing approval

I've seen worse.

I think it would’ve been better if it hadn’t been so sweet.

Not bad, really.

It’s all right, I suppose. Only, it’s a bit bright.

It’ll do for a start.

It was quite good on the whole.

It’s not bad at all, really.

It wasn't a bad film, was it?

It’s quite good, really, but it’s a bit loose for you, I think.

He may be very clever, but he can’t do anything practical.

They look fairly good.

Expressing Hope, Doubt, Satisfaction

Read the following word groups aloud several times. Please don’t try to learn by-heart. Your sub-conscious mind will do that job, even without your knowledge, and rush onto your tongue whenever required. Yes, your job is just to read these word groups aloud several times.

A.

Expressing hope

I hope to see him soon.

I hope you haven’t paid for it.

I hope so.

I think you’ll like our neighborhood.

I only hope he’ll be able to help them out.

I was hoping for good news this time.

I’m rather hoping the weather’ll be good.

I hope we can make them feel welcome.

I hope she’ll do it.

I just hope he’ll be able to come.

We hope to go there next week.

I very much hope they’d realize its importance.

Hopefully, she’ll bring it with him.

Let’s hope she’ll get better soon.

B.

Expressing doubt

I don’t know.

I find it difficult to believe.

I’m not sure.

I’m not certain.

I’m not sure whether he’s telling the truth.

Perhaps…

I doubt if he’ll reach there in time.

That can’t be true.

That means he didn’t actually meet her?

You did hear him say that, didn’t you?

I think he’s the man, but I can’t be certain.

He may call on us on his way there.

Why was that, then?

That seems unlikely, you know.

Surely, you could have explained it to him?

It’s not clear to me why he did such a thing.

Are you absolutely sure he has left?

C.

Expressing satisfaction

This is very good.

This is just what I meant.

This is just what I need.

This is exactly what I was looking for!

This seems to be all right.

I think it’s just right.

It was okay, I suppose.

It’s OK now. Well, isn’t that lovely!

D.

Expressing dissatisfaction

This is not good.

This is not what I need.

I don’t like it.

I’m not satisfied with what I have done for them

This dress is not quite the right style.

I had in mind something very simple.

That won’t do.

His work isn’t up to the mark.

These shoes seem a little short for me.

I don’t like it like this.

E.

Making promises

I promise you.

I will, I promise.

I will do it.

I promise I’ll do it.

I give you my word.

I promise I won’t.

I won’t be late again, I promise I won’t be.

I won’t repeat it, I promise.

I guarantee you’ll like it.

I’ll never be late again, I promise.

I give you my word, I’ll do it.

I undertake to do it, honestly.

You can leave it tome.

You can count on me.

I’ll buy you a necklace for our wedding anniversary.

I don’t know where he has gone, honestly.

I’ll drop in again when I have more time.

If I can’t come tomorrow, I’ll let you know.

I’ll give you a buzz when we’ve finished.

I promise you I’ll be punctual from now on.

I’ll have him get in touch with you as soon as he comes back.

F.

Pointing things out

Look, here it is.

Look at this.

Look at that.

There it is!

Have you seen this?

Here comes the accused.

May I show you…?

Have you seen this?

Look at this statistics.

What about the new one?

Expressing Anger

Don’t bring anger into a conversation: Anger is one letter short of danger. To be effective, you have to be patient. Don’t send the other party the wrong cues. Make sure that you have made them comfortable enough and not turned them off.

A.

Expressing anger

I can’t stand him any longer.

Don’t take it out on me!

No wonder you’re livid.

He flared up at me.

You are an extremely cunning man.

Oh, stop complaining. You make me mad.

Look, this is getting us nowhere.

You are talking nonsense.

That isn’t my fault, is it?

You are a mean/cunning fellow.

I don’t want to see your face.

Don’t show me your face.

Don’t talk nonsense/Stop yapping.

It’s all because of you.

You can’t get away like this.

You can’t escape from this.

You are responsible for this.

Why are you losing temper?

Beware, don’t utter it again!

You are very short-tempered.

What nonsense!

How could you have been so silly?

Don’t try any nonsense with me.

I don’t care what it is.

It’s none of your business.

What a nuisance!

How could you have been so silly?

Don’t try any nonsense with me.

I don’t care what it is.

It’s none of your business.

What a nuisance!

Stop shouting your head off.

Damn that stupid salesman!

Leave me alone, will you?

But this is ridiculous!

He’s always telling lies.

The things I do are my business, not yours.

Good god! Do you expect me to bring it you?

I haven’t got time for this non-sense.

Don’t waste my time.

If you dare say that again, I’ll hit you.

Don’t you dare tell her about this?

Look here, I’ve come to the end of my patience.

Don’t you dare tell lies to me?

Your mind is filled with non-sense!

How dare you touch me?

Stop shouting or I’ll go away.

You’d better watch what you say.

I’ll report it to the HO if you don’t do it.

Do it now, or else…

Damn you!

Oh… Leave it out.

What the hell do you mean?

Who do you think you are?

What’s all this nonsense about?

Remember your manners.

If you do that, you’ll be sorry.

That’s a ridiculous suggestion.

Are you trying to make a fool of me?

Look here, don’t try any nonsense with me.

What a rotten nasty trick!

What harm/wrong have I done to you?

You’ll have to mend your ways.

If you say that again, I’ll break your neck.

He’s always complaining about something.

Never heard of such nonsense!

If you come near me, I’ll scream.

I’m tired of hearing about this stupid fellow.

You mind your own business.

I put trust in you, but you failed me.

What on earth is happening there?

How dare you!

Don’t talk to me like that, or else.

Don’t get heated/excited.

Are you in your senses?

Get out of my sight/Get lost.

How are you concerned with our affairs!

Look, let’s just leave it, shall we?

You’d better not come here again.

If you don’t stop teasing me, I’ll have to leave.

Go to hell.

What the hell do you want?

You had better watch it from now on!

Is that all you’ve got to say?

I’ll be damned if I agree!

How dare you speak to me like that?

You’d better not make another mistake.

Who the hell is that at the front door?

Are you accusing me?

I’ll be writing a stiff letter of complaint to your MD.

Are you suggesting that I should have apologized?

Where on earth have you been?

I knew it!

I’m talking to you.

You’d better behave yourself otherwise; I’ll have to ask you to leave.

Saying ‘no’ Nicely

Sometimes you need to say “no” when someone makes a suggestion, offers something or asks you to do something for them. Of course, saying just ‘no’ can be rather rude. Here are some of the most common ways to say 'no' nicely – or at least not rudely.

A.

• Would you like to watch a film tonight?

           I’m afraid I can’t go out tonight. I’ve got a test tomorrow.

• Why don’t we have some Chinese food?

          Sorry, but I don’t particularly like Chinese food.

• How about taking a nice walk?

         I’d really rather not take a walk this afternoon.

• Would you like to go to the museum with us?

        Thank you, but it’s not my idea of a fun afternoon out.

• Let’s go for a drive

         Sorry, I’m not really fond of driving for the fun of it.

• Why don’t you stay back tonight?

         That’s very kind of you, but I really have to get back to the city.

• To refuse an invitation, to be polite, use;
• Sorry, I can’t.
• No. It’s a pity, but I’ll be (away) then…
• I’m afraid I can’t make it (to your party).
• To be more formal, use:
• I’d love to, but I (have some work to do).
• I’d very much like to accept (your kind invitation) but I regret that (I cannot).
• To be informal, use:
• No. I can’t.
• No. I’m working / I’m at something else.
• To refuse an offer, to be polite, use:
• No thanks/No thank you.
• It’s all right.
• No thanks, I don’t need (help).
• No, I don’t want (any coffee), thanks.
• It’s OK, thanks, I can (do it myself).
• To be more formal, use:
• That’s very kind of you, but it’s all right.
• Thank you for the offer, but I don’t need (it).
• Thank you for your kind offer, but I regret we do not need (your services).
• To be informal, use:
• No.
• I don’t want (any).
• To refuse to be persuaded, use:
• No, really.
• Really, I don’t want any.
• I really don’t (want to go out).
• I really can’t (have another drink).
• I’m not going to change my mind.
• You can’t persuade me.
• You’re not going to change my mind.
• Don’t go on about it.
• I've made up my mind.
• I’m not (buying it), and that’s…

B.

Some commonly used Negative Statements

I said nothing of the sort.

I hardly know that person.

I cannot do this.

I can’t accept what you say.

I think you’re mistaken.

I don’t think they have.

I don’t know how to swim.

I don’t know.

I deny.

I refuse I don’t agree.

I don’t believe. I have no complaints.

I’m afraid that’s not what really happened.

I’m quite sure I never asked you to do it.

I don’t have any complaint.

I hate to contradict you, but I think you’re wrong.

I hate to contradict you, but I didn’t say that.

I certainly did not.

Don’t be so ridiculous!

Don’t cheat anybody.

Don’t be stubborn.

Don’t tread on the log grass.

Don’t do such mischief again

Don’t criticize others.

Don’t lose your temper. Don’t get angry.

Don’t be rude.

Don’t speak harshly to anybody.

Don’t be proud of your influence.

Don’t find fault with others.

No, I really don’t mind driving.

No, I’m afraid you haven’t.

No, he hasn’t.

No, you haven’t told me.

No, I didn’t.

No, that’s not what I meant.

No, I couldn’t go.

That isn’t true.

That’s not what I intended, actually.

That’s a lie.

That’s absolutely ridiculous.

That’s not what I said.

This is not true.

Remember

Notice how we often say ‘thank you’ in some way before refusing the offer. When someone makes an offer it is polite to first thank that person and then say no, often offering an excuse for not wanting or being able to do something. Just saying ‘no’ is considered very rude behavior indeed!

Expressing Sympathy

A.

“Strange is our situation here upon earth. Each of us comes for a short visit, not knowing why, yet sometimes seeming to a divine purpose. From the standpoint of daily life, however, there is one thing we do know: That we are here for the sake of others… for the countless unknown souls with whose fate we are connected by a bond of sympathy. Many times a day, I realize how much my outer and inner life is built upon the labours of people, both living and dead, and how earnestly I must exert myself in order to give in return as much as I have received.”

-          Albert Einstein

B.

Practice the conversation given below

Mary   –   Hello, John, What’s that…? You look dejected. What’s wrong?

John    –   My grandma passed away in New York, Mary.

Mary   –   I’m terribly sorry to hear that, John. How old was she?

John    –   Seventy one… This December.

Mary   –  Then she wasn’t very old. Had she been ailing for some time?

John   –   So she had written in her last letter. She was having a hard time with many complications…

Mary  –  When is the funeral…?

John   –  It must have been over by now.

Mary –  I know how you feel… Words can’t comfort you when someone dear to you departs.

C.

Expressing sympathy

I’m so sorry to see you in this state.

I can’t tell you how sorry I am.

I’m so sorry to hear about that.

I know how it feels.

I’m extremely sorry to hear about it.

I’m sorry. What a bad luck!

I’m terribly sorry.

I’m sorry to hear that.

That’s terrible.

Oh, that’s unfortunate! I’m sorry.

Oh no! I’m ever so sorry.

Oh, bad luck. I’m terribly sorry.

Oh, that’s terrible.

Oh, how upsetting!

Oh, that’s rotten.

Oh, how annoying!

Bad luck! (Comment)

Bad luck, misfortune

He had the bad luck/misfortune…

She was unlucky.

Our deepest condolences/sympathy.

Our heartfelt sympathy/condolences.

Oh, it’s such a shame! That’s a pity!

That’s a crying shame – it really is!

You must be very upset about it.

You’ll get well soon.

What an awful situation for you!

What bad luck!

When did he die? Was it very sudden?

Did he suffer very much?

Bad luck, Mary. You can always try again.

How terrible for you!

Hard luck, John! I know you had worked so hard for the test.

D.

Expressing condolences

Please accept my condolences.

Mary, my deepest sympathy on your sad loss.

I heard about your tragic loss. I’m extremely sorry.

I heard what happened. My deepest sympathy, John.

I heard your uncle is dead. I’m sorry. I’m very sorry to hear your sister is dead.

I’m very sorry to hear about your father. He was such a good man.

E.

Expressing regret

I wish I hadn’t missed the Train.

I feel I shouldn’t have been so rude to the students. I’m so sorry if I’ve hurt you.

I’m sad to hear that.

I’m sorry I couldn’t come.

I regret missing the chance.

Isn't it a pity we missed that film!

If only I hadn’t failed the test!

If only I had listened to them!

That’s a great pity.

That’s a pity.

It’s a pity you couldn’t come.

It’s quite unfortunate.

Really, we should have invited them

Why did I ever say that?

I think it was mean of us not to help them out.

Nobody regrets this more than I do.

Crocodile tears

Appearing to be sad about something but not really feeling sad; showing false sympathy. Used when someone pretends to feel pity for someone else.

Examples: # please don’t shed your crocodile tears for me!

                # His sympathy was just a show of crocodile tears!

Talking about Plans

A.

Read this conversation between John and Mary. What does Mary want to know?

Mary   :  What are you doing this evening John?

John    :  I’m meeting my sister – we’re going to see a film.

Mary   :  Oh. What are you doing tomorrow?

John    :  Um, I don’t think I’m doing anything.

Mary   :  Well, do you want to meet up? Have something to eat?

John    :  Yeah, let’s meet up – that sounds nice. Where shall we eat? Shall we go to the Pizza Corner?

B.

Now practice those phrases. First of all, imagine you’re John. Ask Mary what she’s doing tomorrow.

C.

Read this conversation between John and Mary.

John   : Let’s go to a movie together.

Mary  : I’d love to. When shall we go?

John   : How about coming Friday evening?

Mary  : Let me see…. Oh, I am sorry; I’m having dinner with a friend.

John   : How about the following Tuesday?

Mary  : that’d be great. What shall we see?

John   : Star Wars?

Mary  : No, that’s boring. How about Austin Powers?

John   : Sounds good to me. When shall we meet?

Mary  : Seven? In the Kent Tavern?

John   : Great, see you there.

D.

Bill and Tom are about to finish an English course and they are talking about their future English study plans.

Bill     : Are you going to keep studying English?

Tom   : I hope so. / I plan to watch BBC news every night.

           What about you?

Bill     : I hope to read for an hour every night, but I suppose it will be hard to find enough time.

            Anyway, at least I’ll try to read 21^st Century each week.

E.

Practice the conversation given below:

Kate   : Would you like to go to a movie with me?

Ron    : When do you want to go?

Kate   : How about next Friday evening?

Ron    : I’m sorry, I can’t. I’m having dinner with a friend

Kate   : How about coming Tuesday?

Ron    : I go to evening class on Tuesdays.

Kate   : Oh, may be some other time?

Ron    : Yeah, I’ll give you a call.

F.

Practice the following word groups:

Are you busy this evening?

Are you going to John’s party?

Are you doing anything today evening?

Are you free this evening?

Are you planning to do anything this Sunday?

Are you planning a career in Law?

Have you got any plans for the weekend?

Have you got anything for tomorrow?

Have you got anything fixed up for coming Sunday?

Have you made any plans for the Christmas?

What are you doing today evening?

What do you plan to do once you get there?

What are you going to do tomorrow afternoon?

What are your plans for the summer vacation?

G.

Exercise: Make conversations.

i)                    You want to go to an exhibition with your friend.

ii)                  Someone asks you to dinner but you don’t want to go.

Expressions to sound Persuasive and Convincing

Most people’s jobs require them to influence other people a lot of the time. This could include convincing your boss you deserve a raise, inspiring your team to finish a project, cajoling a colleague to do a presentation for you, getting someone to see your point of view in order to have their support at a meeting.

Influencing can also involve persuading other people to be your champions so they will, in turn, be able to provide access to areas you don’t have any direct route to now. We call this ‘expanding your spheres of influence’, and it can be the key to making your presence felt without appearing out of line.

You may try to exert your influence through coercion and manipulations. You might even succeed in getting things done, but that isn’t really influencing; that’s forcing people to do what you want, often against their will. You won’t have succeeded in winning support.

Real influencing skills are far subtler and fairer than that: They require good interpersonal and communication skills and an ability to get other people want to support you.

An interesting point about people, who use their influencing skills well, is that other people like being around them. There’s a kind of exciting buzz, or sense that things happen when they’re about.

Why is that? Well, think about it for a second or two: they don’t sit around wishing things were different while moaning there’s nothing they can do about it. They also don’t sit around blaming others or complaining about what needs fixing that will make things better. They fix stuff.

And sometimes the most influential person in a company isn’t the one at the top – it’s the one who knows how to get to the one at the top.

Being persuasive is a matter of the way that you say it. It could mean intonation; it could mean selecting a phrase that is appropriate to the context, or to the person concerned. You can improve your skills of persuasion.

A

Trying to persuade

Are you sure you ought to make that complaint?

You really should invite your boss, you know.

That’s quite a good idea, you know.

He’s an excellent Teacher, actually.

Don’t be silly John, it’s not that expensive.

Don’t forget that he’s your uncle.

What about your friends?

What about the time and energy you’ve already invested, then?

Don’t you think you should do something for your institute?

I could do with your support, you know.

I can assure you of my full support.

B.

Trying to convince

I can guarantee…

I tell you, it’s a fact.

I tell you, it’s true.

I tell you, it’s certain.

I am absolutely certain.

I saw him just now, really.

I saw it with my own eyes.

I saw it myself.

I can assure you…

It’s quite true.

It must be true.

It’s quite true.

It’s here in black and white.

It’s crystal clear…

Yes, really. It’s quite true.

Don’t you feel that he could have been mistaken?

You see, the training there is excellent.

But can’t you see that he’s interested in the idea?

That’s all I know, honestly.

But you must admit that he did all he could.

But surely you must agree that this is an extraordinary case.

He’s honest, I can assure you.

It’s here in writing.

Isn’t it possible that he doesn’t know anything about it?

Look, I saw it myself.

Honestly, it’s quite true.

I can guarantee that you’ll get a promotion soon.

But don’t you agree that he was not in station at that time?

This is the best quality we can get – there’s no doubt about it.

           

C.

Insisting on or on doing

I insist on a written report from him.

I insist you do it.

I’m afraid you’ll have to do it.

I want to know when you’ll do it.

I don’t mind waiting. It’s very important.

I won’t go until you give me a full refund.

I’m not laving until I know. I’m sorry. I can’t accept that.

You must go and meet the Director.

You simply must do it.

You really must help him.

You will come before five in the evening – I insist.

You’ll have to finish it by tomorrow.

You must stay for dinner.

You must stay for lunch, I insist.

Do stay for tea.

It’s essential that you meet him.

If you can’t help me, I’d like to see your boss.

Saying that you Understand / or Not

Read the following word groups aloud several times. Please don’t try to learn by-heart. Your sub-conscious mind will do that job, even without your knowledge, and rush onto your tongue whenever required. Yes, your job is just to read these word groups aloud several times.

A.

Saying that you understand

I understand.

I can understand.

I understand how you feel.

I can understand German, but I can’t speak it.

Yes, I get the point.

Right. I think I’ve got the idea now.

I think I’ve got that.

Okay. I get the picture now.

B.

Saying you don’t understand

• When you don’t hear something, use:
• Sorry?
• What was that?
• What did you say?
• I didn’t hear that I couldn’t hear that

• To ask people to repeat it, use:
• Could you say that again?
• Say that again.
• Pardon?
• Could you repeat that, please?
• What did you say the measurements were?
• Can you say it again, please?
• Could you say that again, please?
• Could you explain it again, please?

• To be more formal, use:
• I didn’t catch that
• Sorry, I missed that
• Would you say that again?

• To be informal, use:
• What?

• When you can’t understand a phrase, use:
• What does (that phrase) mean?
• I don’t understand (that).
• I don’t know (that word).
• I understood (this), but not the bit after.
• Did you say (this) or (that)?
• What does it mean?
• I can’t understand Spanish.
• I can’t quite make them out.
• Can you speak a bit more slowly?
• I can’t understand you.
• I can’t make any sense out of it.

• To be formal, use:
• I’m afraid I don’t understand (that)
• Sorry, my Hindi isn’t very good.
• I missed/lost half of that
• Could you spell that?
• Could you write that down?

• When people don’t understand you, use:
• Perhaps I used the wrong (word).
• I’ll try again
• I’m sorry, I don’t follow.
• You’re speaking rather too quickly for me to understand.
• I don’t understand what you’re driving at.
• I didn’t quite follow what you said.
• Excuse me, but what’s your name again?
• What did you say?
• I’m sorry, I didn’t hear that.
• Sorry, I didn’t get that.
• Sorry. What was that?
• How’s that?
• I beg your pardon.
• What was that?
• I didn’t quite get that.

• When someone is difficult to understand, use:
• Could you speak more slowly, please?
• Slower, please.
• Slow down.
• I can’t understand you.
• You’re speaking too quickly for me
• I don’t understand.
• I didn’t quite catch what you
• I’m afraid I didn’t understand.
• Can you translate that?
• Do you speak any (other language)?