Typical Conversation Starters

The most common kind of spoken language is conversation, when one person communicates through speaking to another person or to other people. Just as there are patterns in sounds, words, and sentences, so also there are patterns in conversation. Even in the most unpredictable conversations, there are certain devices that we use time and time again. If a person wants to tell a joke or some bad news or to ask for a special favour, there are recognized ways of introducing these subjects. Without these cues, listeners would be very disconcerted.

Conversations are orderly and proceed in an organized way, but all the participants have to work at the conversation, making sense of things, supporting each other, checking for meaning, and so on. A conversation, unlike a piece of written work, is very much the work of at least two people. One defining characteristic of a conversation is that it does not involve only what is said but also how it is said. One way in which conversation is organized is through utterances of a certain type that go together.

A greeting is usually followed by another greeting.

              Hello               Hi

These utterances are called adjacency pairs. Some examples of these pairs are:

Question          - Answer

Request           - Acceptance or refusal

Complaint       -Apology/denial

Compliment    - Acceptance/rejection.

These structures help to keep the conversation going and enable other people to participate. Questions are especially useful in supporting conversation. When these devices are violated, this can cause anxiety, distress, annoyance, or confusion. These reactions demonstrate the importance of observing the rules of conversation.

A.

Typical Conversation Starters:

Excuse me,

Forgive me for asking

I hope you don’t mind me asking,

I’m sorry to trouble you,

Aren't you the son of …?

Haven’t we met before?

Could I borrow your pen?

Is anyone sitting here?

Is this seat taken?

Talking about the weather

o       Can you believe all of this rain we’ve been having?

o       It looks like it’s going to snow.

o       Beautiful day, isn’t it?

o       It sure would be nice to be in Hawaii right about now.

o       I hear they’re calling for thunderstorms all weekend.

o       We couldn’t ask for a nicer day, could we?

o       How about this weather?

o       Did you order this sunshine?

o       Lovely day, isn’t it?

Talking about current events

• Did you catch the news today?
• Did you hear about that fire on Fourth St?
• What do you think about this transit strike?
• I read in the paper today that the Sears Mall is closing.
• I heard on the radio today that they are finally going to start building the new bridge.
• How about those Reds? Do you think they’re going to win tonight?

B.

At the office

• Looking forward to the weekend?
• Have you worked here long?
• I can’t believe how busy/quiet we are today, can you?
• Has it been a long week?
• You look like you could use a cup of coffee.
• What do you think of the new computers?

C.

At a social event

• So, how do you know Justin?
• Have you tried the cabbage rolls that Sandy made?
• Are you enjoying yourself?
• It looks like you could use another drink.
• Pretty nice place, huh?
• I like your dress. Can I ask where you got it?

D.

Out for a walk

• How old’s your baby?
• What’s your puppy’s name?
• The tulips are sure beautiful at this time of year, aren’t they?
• How do you like the new part?
• Nice day to be outside, isn’t it?

E.

Waiting somewhere

• I didn’t think it would be so busy today.
• You look like you’ve got your hands full (with children or goods).
• The bus must be running late today.
• It looks like we are going to be here a while, huh?
• I’ll have to remember not to come here on Mondays.
• How long have you been waiting?

F.

Other Starters

• Those are lovely flowers!
• What a marvelous party!
• Don’t you think she’s gorgeous?
• That’s so wonderful!
• Yes, it is gorgeous. It’s raining here!
• What kind are they? I love tulips.
• Oh that was really fun, wasn’t it?
• Not really. Oh yes, she is a looker.

G.

Make a comment on something present:

Traffic everywhere is terrible!

This isn’t so bad. You could be stuck in Manila traffic!

The service on this line is getting worse day after day!

They must be short handed today.

Can you believe it?

No way! It can’t be true!

Transportation fare has gone up again!

It drives me nuts that everything keeps going up and up.

When will it ever stop raining?

I actually like rainy days. But, one week of rain is a little hard to deal with.